Many, many years ago when I was twenty-three, I got married to a widow who was as pretty as could be. This widow had a grown-up daughter Who had hair of red. My father fell in love with her, And soon the two were wed. This made my dad my son-in-law And changed my very [...]

My supervisor — let’s call him Greenbean — said that there were certain bigwigs who you should never put on hold, certain VIPs who you should never put on hold, and I could never remember who those people were. So, I put everyone on hold and I conferenced them, and I let them sort it out amongst themselves.

My supervisor — let’s call him Greenbean — said that there were certain bigwigs who you should never put on hold, certain VIPs who you should never put on hold, and I could never remember who those people were. So, I put everyone on hold and I conferenced them, and I let them sort it out amongst themselves.

Position of a Husband Is just like a Split AC No matter however Loud he is in the Outdoor He is designed to remain Silent indoor… “Husband is one who is the head of the family, but his wife is the neck, and whichever way she turns, he goes.” A man in Hell asked Devil: [...]

She actually asked me for four grapes once. She counted grapes. What kind of mental patient counts grapes? Do you know anyone who does that? That’s the weirdest thing. I was like, ‘Four grapes…’ To me grapes aren’t even a food. They’re like a palate cleanser. That’s what I eat to get the Big Mac taste out of my mouth.

The only thing IRS has not yet taxed is the penis. This is due to the fact that 70% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 13% of the time it is pissed off, 12% of the time it is hard up, and 5% of the time it’s in the hole. It has two [...]

I actually recently had this bathroom adventure. I went to this urinal to, you know, urinalate, and this guy comes to the urinal, like, right next to me. You girls probably don’t know this, but if a guy comes to the urinal right next to you, and there’s, like, plenty of other urinals to go to, you always glance over to make sure he’s not looking at your stuff, right? ‘Cause it’s yours. But the weird thing was that he glanced over and I glanced over at the same time, so we met eyes. I know — that was weird. So, I kissed him.

The woman entered the room, and with a knowing smile teasing her full lips, she sank into the comfort of the plush chair in the corner. The handsome stranger turned, having sensed her approach. Locking his steely gray eyes on hers, he moved slowly toward her, his experienced gaze measuring her, hypnotizing her with his [...]

Ladies, next time your man pisses you off, do not give him the silent treatment. Instead, go Google the most important game of the season, sit next to him during that game and just ask as many f**king questions as possible. ‘I don’t understand, who’s that guy in the striped shirt? Does he work at Foot Locker? I don’t understand, why are they all wearing the same outfit? When are we going to have a baby?’ Eventually he will shoot himself in the face, and you f**king win that argument.

A wealthy playboy met a beautiful young girl in an exclusive lounge. He took her to his lavish apartment where he soon discovered she was not a tramp, but was well groomed and apparently very intelligent. Hoping to impress her, he began showing her his collection of expensive paintings, first editions by famous authors and [...]